George Carlin Quotes on Politics - LiveAbout 46. Pointless careerism, putting on a man tailored suit and shoulder pads and imitating all the worst behavior of men? And athletes, athletes got into uppers, college athletes. Next fucking case! Darryl Stingley, the pro football player, was paralyzed after a brutal hit by Jack Tatum. We dont even know how to take care of ourselves; we havent learned how to care for one another. And complaining about the politicians. This is what we have to offer. You know the best thing about necrophilia? You know why? And for billions and billions of years, the Divine Plan has been doing just fine. If he paralyzes Jack Tatum's son, that will be precisely ironic. So self-important. Put the blame where it belongs: on the people. Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. George Carlin, 31. Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. And the sad part is, is that most people seem to have been indoctrinated to believe that bullshit only comes from certain places, certain sources: advertising, politics, salesmen not true. He's always got his arm out and his leg up. The only country that could invade America is America! 1. I can't follow the logic on that one at all! The rights and the rights of property. I, on the other hand, who did not vote -- who did not even leave the house on Election Day -- am in no way responsible for what these politicians have done and have every right to complain about the mess that you created.". These people call themselves "right to lifers." I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. You don't wait thirty years. Here's some bumper stickers I'd like to see: We are the proud parents of a child whose self esteem is sufficient that he doesn't need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car. Birth control pills are still on prescription. George Carlin - Wikispooks They don't want to hear from you. They never mention coffee. George Carlin. George Carlin : It's the only metaphor we have in our public discourse for solving a problem; it's called declaring a war. ", "Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things. ""Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. It's what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. Seems like a big waste of time to me! The people are [bleeped out]. A pimp who drives a Toyota Corolla. They own everything. Don't let my beard become entangled in the gears of a transcontinental bus. Let's face it, we have very little to work with. And these people with the fires and the floods and everything, they overbuild, they put nature to the test and they get what's coming to them. You have no choice. George Carlin is Back from the Dead to Haunt Trump in Devastating It's like watching flies fuck! Amen and Awomen. When you get to Wikipedia, in the search field for Wikipedia, I want you to type in ". The sanctity of life doesn't seem to apply to cancer cells, does it? I have major psychotic fucking hatreds. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. That's all we've ever had in this country, is a bill of temporary privileges. It simply does not give a fuck about you! Like the public. You can say what you want about this country, and I love this place. Are people's lives so bankrupt they sit at home looking at things they already DID? Now we're really going to get even: we're sending experts to show them how to run their economy. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shittier jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it. Save the planet, we don't even know how to take care of. First thing- "Hey! If Barry Bonds attains lifetime statistics identical to his father's, it will not be ironic. That's generally been true. I'd like to repeat that, because it sounds *vaguely* important!